“I met the last real good guy”

Valerie Bertinelli reflects on her past relationship.

In an Instagram post on February 17 Valerie's Home Cooking Star learned what she had from her former partner and herself. She eventually added a disclaimer on the grounds that her wisdom was informed by “two failed marriages” and that she “fucked out the last real good person I met.”

First, Bertinelli notes that when seeking an apology, you should choose a softer approach – not to give anger or frustration, otherwise it might feel like an attack, but to calmly think about the whole thing carefully, and Consider another person's point of view.

“When feeling attacked, the natural response is to turn off and become defensive and feel overwhelmed by changing behavior, which may be the coping mechanism since childhood,” Bettinelli wrote. “They will feel judged and feel unable to do so.” Do anything and they won't really hear you.”

“If you no longer focus on what they are doing wrong, but treat it through empathy and understanding, everything starts to change.”

Bertinelli recognizes that being a big shot is not easy, especially if you are hurt or angry. But putting these feelings on hold could pave the way for an apology, modify or closure you “deserve.”

Food Network alum also stressed that finding new ways to “show each other” is a language of love, just like everyone else’s growth and learning.

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“I think we all want to do better and feel bad when we hurt someone we love and humiliate and stop us from thinking clearly,” she said. “Rescue the person we like from shame. , so they can really give you the amendments you need, isn't that great? ”

The long message is more than two years of divorce from former husband Tom Vitale after months of separation from writer Mike Goodnough in November 2024 . Prior to that, she married the late Eddie Van Halen from 1981 to 2007.

In November, Bertinelli reflected on his personal growth since his divorce from Vitale.

“Today is two years of freedom.” indulgence The author has subtitled the Instagram post. “For two years, I've experienced self-doubt and tried my best to get to the other end. Two years knowing I shouldn't tolerate intolerable. Two years of shame and self-loathing work. (Still working on that part that 😅) Two years of searching for me The true self.”

She also yelled at Goodno.

“In the end of two years I was dipping my toes in and feeling love again. (Thanks Mike♥♥),” Bettinelli wrote. “For two years, facing the demons and trauma of the past and doing my best to solve it.”